Articles

[*yutab*]

thanks for writing this lovely theory
i was really surprised after reading it

[olinda]

thank you for considration

[olinda]

WHY COFFEE IS BETTER THAN WOMEN?

1. You don't have to put cream in your coffee to make it taste good.
2. Coffee doesn't complain when you put whipped cream in it.
3. A cup of coffee looks good in the morning.
4. You won't fall asleep after a cup of coffee.
5. You can always warm coffee up.
6. Coffee comes with endless refills.
7. Coffee is cheaper.
8. You won't get arrested for ordering coffee at 3 AM.
9. Coffee never runs out.
10. Coffee is out of your system by tomorrow morning.
11. You can take black coffee home to meet your parents.
12. You can make coffee as sweet as you want.
13. You can smoke while drinking coffee.
14. You can grind out a cigarette in a cup of coffee.
15. Coffee smells and tastes good.
16. You don't have to put vinegar in your coffee.
17. If your coffee pot leaks, you can use a regular paper towel.
18. You can always get fresh coffee.
19. You can put coffee on, leave the room, and it'll be ready when you get
back.
20. They sell coffee at police stations.
[ برای مشاهده لینک ، با نام کاربری خود وارد شوید یا ثبت نام کنید ]

[olinda]

21. You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee.
22. Coffee goes down easier.
23. If you put chocolate in your coffee, it doesn't put on weight.
24. No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee.
25. A big cup or small cup? It doesn't matter.
26. Your coffee doesn't talk to you.
27. Coffee smells good in the morning.
28. Coffee is good when it's cold too.
29. Coffee stains are easier to remove.
30. Coffee doesn't care when you dunk things in it.
31. Coffee doesn't really care what kind of mood you're in.
32. Coffee doesn't shed.
33. Coffee is ready in 15 minutes or less.
34. You can't get a cup of coffee pregnant by putting cream in it.
35. Coffee doesn't mind being ground.
36. No matter how bad coffee is, you can always make it better.
37. Coffee doesn't have a time of the month...it's good all the time.
38. When coffee gets old, you can throw it away.
39. When you have a coffee, you don't end up with a pube in the back of your
throat.
40. Coffee doesn't take up half your bed

[olinda]

41. Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3 AM and decide you want some.
42. INSTANT COFFEE!
43. You can have an intelligent conversation over coffee.
44. It can take up to 2 weeks for coffee to grow mold.
45. Coffee doesn't mind sleeping on its wet spot
46. You can pickup some coffee at a 7/11 any hour of the night
47. Having a cup of coffee wakes you up instead of putting you to sleep
48. You can put your lips to a cup of coffee without buying it dinner first
49. Coffee doesn't require hours of diddling foreplay. It's served hot.
50. A hot woman spilled on your lap isn't worth $4 Million.
51. You can get coffee out of a machine, and press a few buttons to get it
just the way you like it.
52. Even prisoners are allowed to have coffee
53. You don't have to tell coffee you love it.
54. Coffee doesn't ride the brakes in your Porsche
55. You don't have to be beautiful or rich to get a fresh cup every morning
56. A cup of coffee doesn't require a line to pick up
57. A friend will buy you a donut AND a coffee
58. There's always coffee to be had
59. Coffee doesn't expect you to maintain its vehicle
60. Great coffee only costs a buck more than the cheap stuff
61. Your coffee won't be jealous of a larger cup.
[ برای مشاهده لینک ، با نام کاربری خود وارد شوید یا ثبت نام کنید ]

[olinda]

Before the marriage :

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.

She: Do you want me to leave?

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He : Of course!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Yes!

She: Will you hit me?

He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!

She: Can I trust you?

He: Yes.

She : Dear !!

Now after the marriage (

you can read it from below to up !

[arman50cent]

British/North American Vocabulary

Here are some of the main differences in vocabulary between British and North American English.
BritishCanadianAmericananywhere anywhereanyplace autumn autumn/fallfall barrister lawyerattorney beeper, pagerpagerbeeperbill (restaurant)billcheckbiscuit cookiecookie block of flatsapartment blockapartment buildingbonnet hoodhood boot (of car) trunk (of car) trunk (of automobile) car carautomobile caravan trailertrailer chemist drugstoredrugstore chest of drawersdresserbureauchipsFrench fries/chipsFrench frieschocolate barchocolate barcandy barthe cinema moviesthe movies clothes pegclothes pegclothespincoffincoffincasketcondom condomrubber crisps potato chipspotato chips crossroads intersectionintersection cupboard cupboardcloset cutlerycutlerysilverwarediversion diversion, detourdetour drawing-pin thumbtackthumbtack driving licencedriver's licencedriver's licensedummy (for babies) sootherpacifier dustbin garbage can, trash canashcan, garbage can, trashcan dustman garbagemangarbage collector engine enginemotor estate agent real estate agentrealtor film moviemovie flat apartmentapartment flat tyre flat tireflat flyover overpassoverpass galoshesgaloshestoe rubbersgear-lever gearshiftgearshift Girl GuideGirl GuideGirl Scoutground floor ground floor, main floorfirst floor handbag handbagpurseholiday holidayvacation jamjamjellyjeansjeansblue jeansjug jugpitcher lift elevatorelevator lorry trucktruck luggageluggagebaggagemad crazycrazy main road main road, main thoroughfarehighway maize corncorn maths mathmath mobile (phone)cellular phonecellularmotorbikemotorbike, motorcyclemotorcyclemotorway highway, thoroughfarefreeway, expressway motorway freewayfreeway napkinserviette, table napkinnapkinnappy diaperdiaper naughts and crossestick-tack-toetic-tack-toepants shortsshorts pavement sidewalk, pavementsidewalk petrol gas, gasolinegas, gasoline The PloughBig DipperBig Dipperpocket moneypocket moneyallowancepost mail, postmail postbox mailbox, post-boxmailbox postcodepostal codezip codepostman mailman, letter carriermailman pub bar, pubbar public toilet bathroomrest room puncture flatflat railway railwayrailroad return (ticket) returnround-trip reverse charge collect call, reverse the chargescall collect ring roadring roadbeltwayroad surface road surface, asphaltpavement roundabout roundabouttraffic circle rubber erasereraser rubbish garbage, trash, refusegarbage, trash rubbish-bin garbage can, trashcangarbage can, trashcan saloon (car) sedan (car)sedan (automobile) shop shop, storestore single (ticket) one-way (ticket)one-way solicitor lawyerattorney somewhere somewheresomeplace spanner wrenchwrench spiritsspiritshard liquorsweets candy, sweetscandy tap (indoors) tap (indoors) faucet tap (outdoors) tap (outdoors)spigot taxi taxicab tea-towel dish-towel dish-towel telly, TVTVTVthird-party insurancethird-party insuranceliability insurancetimetable scheduleschedule tin tin cancan toll motorway toll highwayturnpike torch flashlightflashlight trousers pantspants tube (train) subway, metro subway underground (train) subway, metrosubway underpants shortsshorts van trucktruck vest undershirtundershirt waistcoat vestvest wallet walletbillfold wellington boots rubber bootsrubbers whiskywhisky, scotchwhiskey, scotchwindscreen windshield windshield zip zipper zipper

[olinda]

DEATHS THAT MADE EVEN TOP DOCTORS WONDER...


This case happened in a hospital's Intensive care ward where Patients
always died in the same bed and on all Sunday morning at 11a.m,
regardless of their medical condition.

This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to
do with the supernatural.
No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM.

So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down
to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents. So on next Sunday
morning few minutes before 11 a.m.
all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for
themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding
wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off
evil........

Just when the! clock struck 11...

and then......

then.....


then........


Santa Singh (SARDAR) , the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and
Unplugged the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner.

[olinda]

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- NO OVERPOWERING

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..

[olinda]

---- RIGHT SPEECH

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered,"You should appreciate that you married me. Other wise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.